You wanna know what a real relationship is like? Do you really understand what you’re talking about when you go on and on about “being in love”? A real relationship is risk, love is something that develops over time in a relationship, don’t get those two confused. A real relationship is not the sweet late night talks, it is not sacrificing your sleep to spend hours talking on the phone, it is not the sugar coated words that someone feeds down your throat, love is not just holding hands and being sweet, it’s not the paragraphs filled with those certain words or phrases that makes you go “awhhh”, it’s not what you see in the films, not what the media defines for you to chase down while you keep in mind your “own” warped definition of what you think a real relationship should be like. Honestly your significant other might not shower you with gifts, or surprise you with flowers, they won’t show up at your door unplanned because would you, yourself, do that? Why would you expect so much out of someone else when you would not do the same for them?
In truth a relationship is hard work, a real relationship lasts through distance, through petty but meaningful arguments, it’s filled with laughter and even though it looks so perfect and easy to everyone else but it takes a tremendous amount of work. You gotta work for your happiness right? Real relationship don’t come easy meaning that to obtain your ideal type of love, the unselfish, sacrificial, long lasting, heartfelt type of love relationship you have to try your hardest to make it work out. What I’m trying to make you understand is that it doesn’t come easy, it’s not made out to be easy, and sure as heck it’s not going to be like the movies so get rid of that ideal you have set inside your mind since you were little. That’s not realistic, it’s idealistic and seems fantastic but then again a magic trick is only a trick after all.
Where am I getting with this? Oh okay here, a real relationship is filled with trust, laughter, passion, and time spent together - not over the phone or through a computer- but actual face to face time. Don’t think you have fallen in love so quickly just because you talk to them every night and that you so dearly miss them when they are not around you. That’s not love, that’s infatuation. Love takes time to develop a lot and a lot of time. So when you have worked through the distance, the huge problems, the head wrenching and heart aching pain, if you’re still okay and sane, congratulations both of you have survived and along the road you both have grown stronger together, you know developed an unbreakable bond between you, and you both love each other deeply and whole.
But before you jump on that train, you have to be strong enough to be alone. There is a thin line between being in love and being foolish, and you need to know when enough is enough. Fights are never good and are negative, but getting your feelings out to talk and trying fix the problems is a good things. So when you start to think you’re the only one working to save a relationship because the other person won’t even try, give them a chance and if they fail then you have to realize when to quit it. Leaving someone you love isn’t an easy thing to do, but you have to know that you deserve more than this. If you love someone with all your heart you can’t be with them anymore if you start to hate the person you have become. Don’t sacrifice yourself and ruin yourself, never lower your standards, don’t give up everything. Love tells you to go on strong and keep on trying but remember that you are only human and that you can’t fix everything. Life won’t go your way, real relationships aren’t easy, love is something you work for, and as much as you love someone with all your heart, knowing when to let go proves your strength. You are only yourself, just one person,the people you love can’t even shield pain, your strength will protect you in life, it’s the only thing that will shield you from harm. So remember, before you decide to chase after a relationship you have to be strong enough to know how and when to let go. you’re not giving up, you’re just saving yourself.
